I am not a mom who yells — much. But there are times when I feel like no one is listening, everyone is talking and I HAVE TO SCREAM!! And then I feel like crap…
Actually, this doesn’t just happen in motherhood. I’ve had many times in my life that I’ve felt like my only choice was to raise my voice to be heard.
When I yell at my kids, it gets their attention and they usually do what I want them to do. Good. Then later, when they feel frustrated and can’t get their way, I hear them scream. Bad.
I know why meditation is so important. When we fill our lives with noise, we don’t have to hear our true selves telling us who we really are. We’d rather listen to others ideas, opinions, stories and songs.
We get what we give. I do not want to raise children who feel helpless unless they are heard. So I have to look inside myself and find my strength in my silence. The squeaky wheel may get the grease, and sometimes it’s necessary to buck up and not get walked on. But most of the time, those that we see as strong are those who can stay calm and quiet in the midst of chaos. A friend told me recently that it is human nature to want to be known and understood. I totally get that. And inside of me is not some crazy woman who is screaming on the inside. So I set my intention for my practice and my life to embrace the silence.
“We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature – trees, flowers, grass – grows in silence; see the stars, the moon, the sun, how they move in silence…we need silence to be able to touch souls.” Mother Teresa